Monday, March 05, 2012

Overcoming Fear by Carrie Daws

Fear. It’s a four letter word. Women who know me today would probably say I’m not afraid of anything. Except spiders. But let’s not go there. I’ve ridden on motorcycles with my husband. I’ve taken on every ride at the fair with my pre-teen son. I jumped out of an airplane. What could possibly scare me? Lots of things!

People scare me. I just don’t know what to say. Some kind woman will walk up to me and I stand there like an idiot because my mind goes completely blank! How can you participate in a conversation with a blank mind?

The publishing world scares me. Some days I feel like I willingly stepped into a glass house and asked everyone to come throw something. And to ask their friends to come look and throw something. And if that’s not scary enough, I’m actively looking for strangers to come look and throw something, too. Writers are part crazy.

Marketing scares me. My desk is a mess of sticky notes reminding me of all kinds of things. Like to make seven meaningful interactions on the web today. And ways to raise my “likeability quotient”. And to not forget tags on my blogs. And to figure out what pingbacks are, other than to know I need them. And to read that latest email on backlinking. And if your head isn’t spinning trying to understand all that then you should come help me out!

I could get more personal. Spiders bigger than a freckle terrify me. Beetles aren’t in my top five fears, but I certainly don’t intentionally get closer than three or four feet from one. Not being in control can be a pet peeve but in some situations definitely rates as a fear. My soon-to-be-driving teenager on the road without me terrifies me. My children moving out away from my protective shelter is still a few years away but is uncomfortable to think about for long.

In all of this I must remember that God did not design me to live in fear. Fear controlled me for a lot of years. Ridiculously tied me in knots. Until I had the courage to say, “Enough.” One day I decided to stand on God’s Word that He did not give us the spirit of fear but of power and love and self-discipline. The enemy of my soul wanted me bound and immobile and ineffective. And fear was his weapon that worked quite well for many years. I could choose to operate in self-discipline, accepting God’s love and power to do things from killing a spider to jumping out of an airplane.

Fear is the weapon I chose to give the main character, Amber, in my debut novel Crossing Values. Like me, she reaches a point where she must choose to fight the fear growing within her or allow it to continue to control her destiny. At this critical moment, another character reaches out to her and simply tells her, “I believe you were made for more than running from your past.”

You, dear woman, were also made for more than fear has in store for you. Reach out to the power available to you in Christ and step forward in God’s promise to provide you with power and love and self-discipline.

About Carrie Daws:
Over the years, God rewrote Carrie’s dreams to include being a stay-at-home mom and a writer. Originally writing weekly devotions as a way to share what she learned with women from various military bases, Carrie decided to enroll in the Christian Writer’s Guild. While there, seeds were planted and cultivated.

After almost ten years in the military, Carrie’s husband medically retired and they now live in central North Carolina with their three children. Besides writing fiction novels, she stays busy with homeschooling, working part time, and volunteering within two military ministries

About Crossing Values

For years, Amber traipsed around the northwest avoiding the skeletons in her closet. Job-hopping every few weeks, she refused to let anyone get close to her as she slowly made her way east. As winter plants itself firmly across the Rockies, she decides to take a chance on a job at a logging company with a family different from any she’s ever known.

Watching the family interact creates more questions than answers for Amber. Feeling like she’s entered the happily-ever-after written at the end of fairytales, she watches for cracks in the fa├žade. Surely as the days pass, the play-acting will cease and the real family will emerge.

Or could she be wrong? Could they truly be genuine? Could Faye understand the trauma from her past or Peter think of her as more than just the winter office help? Could this family really hold the key to what she’s seeking?

You can buy Crossing Values by Carrie Daws at Amazon or Christian Book Distributors.

Connect with Carrie:
Twitter: @CarrieDaws


  1. Carrie, great blog post! Fear is one of Satan's most used tactics. I, too, wrestle with fear. Fear of not being good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, etc...I'm coming to grips with a lot of it, but, as you stated, we must stand on what God says about us, not what the world or enemy whispers in our ear. Keep fighting the good fight of faith! I'm excited for you!


  2. Thanks, Kelley! Gosh -- we have a lot in common!! I never thought of myself as pretty, always hated my smile and envied those of others, figured in school I wasn't smart enough to be at the top so why try too hard, just gave enough to keep my grades acceptable to my parents. Ugh! Fear controlled me for so long! Stand with me and we'll fight it together!

  3. thanks for sharing with us, Carrie! I'm with you on the spiders. I almost left my office when I saw that picture! ACH!

    Oh, and just so you know, I still don't know what a pingback is either. "Ping me" is a comment that I have no idea how to respond to! I sure hope someone comments and explains!

    Fear is an ugly thing, isn't it? It looks back at me from my mirror every single day... thanks for the reminder that we are more than conquerers!

  4. Oh, me, too, Serena!! A friend posted the article on Facebook and the picture of the spider came up! Ewww!! My skin started crawling. Sigh ... I wonder how God will deal with that in us in Heaven? LOL!

    Thank you for allowing me to share with your ladies! It's an honor to be here.

  5. Awesome post! I love the idea of using fear as a WEAPON! Very cool. That book sounds fantastic. And you're not the only one with fear of spiders. My husband...well, I don't think he's scared of them exactly, but he certainly would rather not be around them! LOL

  6. Maybe spiders don't get to go to no more fear of spiders! Very nice post, Carrie. I have arachnophobia , so I had to back up from the monitor while I read the text showing the spider. A scary moment in my life is when a spider dropped down on a string of web in front of my face while I was driving. I did a little Andretti driving, I'll tell you. And really, I think fear like that is different than a generalized fear that stymies one from taking on life or people or situations. That kind must be squashed with faith. Thanks for the thoughts, girl!

  7. Me too, me too. I share your fears and claim your cure. This social media stuff not only scares me. It's keeping me up nights! LOL When you find out what a pingback is pleeease share.
    Great post, Carrie.

  8. Excellent post Carrie! I love how you tied it in with the character in your story. I read once that our two basic emotions are love and fear. Every emotion we have stems from one of those two. Once I saw that, it was so much easier to tap into my feelings. One of these days I'll work on my fear of snakes. Or not. I just can't seem to go there. Just writing the word freaks me out a bit. lol

  9. Beautiful post, Carrie! Fear is so limiting and self-defeating, but such a powerful adversary to overcome. Being a baby blogger has been very fearful for me; that fear of asking friends and strangers to come look and throw something. I laughed aloud when I read that paragraph because I can so relate to it! I still don't really know what a pingback is or how to do one? Is it something you do? HA! Please share with us when you find out. Many times a day I have to stop and remind myself that God didn't intend for me to live and fear and that "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Thanks for the amazingly beautiful reminder!

  10. I like that, Debbie -- getting everything down to either fear or love makes it very simple and basic. Seems easier to deal with!

    I'm with you on the spider, Jodi! As I scroll down to check on comments -- I scroll REALLY fast! LOL...

    I can still remember the day, April when my husband called to see how my day was going. I was heading to get one of his boots and he just could not understand why I refused to squash a spider with my own shoe. Eww! Spider guts on my own shoe??? I don't think so! Plus the boot was heavy enough that if I threw it just right ... I didn't have to get within 3 feet of the thing! LOL!

  11. Carrie, that's a beautiful post! I love the line you quoted from your book. Fear seems to have been (and to some extent still is) a major part of my life. I'm working on turning things over to God (can we say trust issues?), but every day I do a little better. Thank you for the needed reminder to fear doesn't have to rule me when I place myself in the Lord's hands. *hugs*

  12. Thanks, DB! I think so many of the comments I receive from Crossing Values is exactly because fear touches all of us in one way or another. It's a daily battle for me to recognize it better and therefore not let it win!

  13. So true. Fear is such a powerful beast. I know I'm always having to remind myself that it doesn't come from God.

  14. Me, too, Juju! Some days it needs to be a more constant reminder than other!

  15. As an honest to goodness published author, aren't you suppose to know all those things about blogging? i am so thrilled that you were honest in your post. Thank you. i used to find my next novel to read on the bookstore or library shelf! Now i get them from reading favorite blogs. And this one sounds great. Thanks for sharing, Carrie, and thanks for featuring her, Joy.

  16. Thanks for the encouragement, Marianne! Like so many things in life, I'm finding that the more I learn, the more I realize I don't know! And I might have finally figured out Pingbacks! =)

  17. This was such a great post. I enjoyed it and am adding Crossing Values to my TBR list now.

  18. Shoot, so sorry I'm late coming to this party! This is such a great post, Carrie (although, truth be told, I did some mighty fast speed reading past that spider so that I could scroll it out of sight.)

    There was a time when I was heartily vying for the title of "Queen of the Fear Mongers." I needed tell you, what a dreadful state that is to be in. The true light-bulb-soul-shaking-turning-point came one evening with something that came up in bible study, even though I know it was something I should've known all along. In short, "Giving into Fear is negating our trust in God. What are we putting on the top tier in our life -- Faith or Fear? If we trust and have faith in the power of God over all things,then there's no place for fear." I think of that every time I'm tempted to be fearful-- which is often--and I send it packing before it ever has a chance to settle in. (I'm the mother of 4 children and hubby is currently waging war against a health issue, you know what I'm talking about!) "Do not fear." Jesus said it, I believe it, I try and live it. Honestly though, I still jump back ten feet anytime I see a spider. Ick, not a fan.

  19. Right there with you. I'm arachnophobic and totally freaked when I saw that picture! Great, encouraging post. (Well, the part I read anyways. I skipped the paragraph with eight-legs in it.) ;)


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